It's my birthday! Happy birthday to me! :)
I love birthdays. I love to pack the whole month of October full of festivities. My family and friends will tell you that I'm a little over the top when it comes to birthdays, but I can't help it! It's a time for celebration and reflection.
Today, I turn 34 years old. I'd like to publicly reflect on a list of 34 things I wish I'd known 10 years ago. Just a few life lessons. I'd like to share these with you because, as a therapist, I know how healing it can be to practice reflections like this, and I want to share a little wisdom that I'd like to impart to my younger self. I hope you find these lessons resonate with you, too.
1. You, in fact, can trust yourself
2. Grounding yourself before you react to something upsetting ensures you remain in control, rather than your emotions.
3. Diets don’t work, and they ruin your relationship with food and your body.
4. Therapy is one of the most useful tools available for overall wellness and health
5. Parents are real human beings, and they are living life for the first time as well.
6. Just because you didn’t intend to hurt someone, doesn’t mean that they weren’t hurt.
7. You have to communicate boundaries. You can’t expect people to know what you need.
8. Boundaries are necessary in healthy relationships.
9. Boundaries are hard. Set them anyway.
10. Journaling helps you to get things out of your head, and it offers an opportunity to reflect on your progress.
11. Yoga is a really helpful way to improve your relationship with your body. You’ll do things you never thought you could do.
12. Meditation will help you be less irritable, less anxious, and will let you enjoy life more.
13. Just because you can do it alone, doesn’t mean you have to.
14. Setting realistic goals and creating a plan to achieve them helps you control what you can to build the life you want.
15. Evaluating your relationship with money is a very important thing to do.
16. Mistakes are not the end of the world, no matter how big they seem.
17. Everything is figureoutable
18. You will never stop learning
19. Your space is an extension of your mind. Tidy space = feeling better
20. Criticism can be hard to hear, but it is very useful to consider and build upon
21. You are responsible for your own happiness
22. It is not your job to make other people comfortable
23. Social media is not real life
24. Taking care of your inner child is healing and necessary for a fulfilled life
25. You don’t have to follow some arbitrary timeline for your life
26. Overextending yourself leads to resentment. It’s okay to say no.
27. Know when to say no. Get to know your limits, and revisit/revise them often.
28. Don’t be afraid to be bad at something. That’s how you get good at things.
29. Practice non-attachment. Being too attached to any thing, person, or outcome will lead to suffering.
30. The people you surround yourself with will shape who you are– so choose those people wisely.
31. Be honest. Speak the truth in love.
32. Don’t fear failure–it’s the best way to learn.
33. You are allowed to change your mind.
34. Your time on Earth is limited. Be intentional with how you spend it.